Most people don’t purposely ignore the signs of a pending breakup, rather the human psyche is designed to reduce pain and stress, so it is natural to ignore (subconciously) the tell tale signs of the end of a relationship. In reality, ignoring a problem rarely ever makes it go away, in fact it will typically make the situation worse when it you do finally argue about it.

Here are some classic signs that your relationship is headed for a breakup. Some of these may seem obvious,but it is really easy for people to ignore the obvious.

How Much Time Do You Spend Together? Think about how much time your boyfriend or girlfriend actually spends with you. Then think about they are spending time with when they are not with you. Avoidance is probably the number one sign of an impending breakup. If your relationship fits this example, then try to find ways to spend more time together, even if it seems obvious to your partner what you are trying to do. By asking to spend more time together or planning a date, it shows them that you
haven’t given up and want to fight to save your relationship.

Lack of Trust Can Be A Relationship Killer: What is the first thing you think about when he or she tells you where they’ve been? Do you distrust them or does it not even enter your mind to second guess their answer? If your boyfriend or girlfriend questions you all the time about where you’ve been or who you were with, then they may have trust issues with you. If there is a lack of trust in a relationship, things can go down hill really fast.

If you are the one mistrusting him or her, then try really hard not to, because even if you never say anything to their face about your mistrust, your body language will always give you away. If you want to make your relationship work then just have faith. By giving him the benefit of the doubt outright, you will be sending the message that you love him and trust him to do the right thing.

If your partner doesn’t trust you, then make a concerted effort to keep him or her well informed about where you are going and what you are doing. Some people think this is demeaning yourself, but in a loving and trusting relationship, you should want to make sure your partner knows where you are so they don’t have to worry. By making an extra effort for awhile about informing them about your day it will send a message that they can trust you.

Lack of patience for you, your hobbies and interests: If you love to watch football and she doesn’t at least try to understand and/or takes it personally that you are not spending time with her, then be careful. Football isn’t the greatest example, but the point I’m trying to make is that in a loving relationship, people at least have a respect for what the other person likes to do even if they themselves don’t like to do it. (Now if you are watching football all the time, then she may have a valid point) The thing to watch out for here is a decrease in his or her patience for the things you like to do. If she was ok with you going bowling with the guys before but now gets irritated or doesn’t want to hear your stories about the big fish you caught on the river…Be Careful!

A healthy relationship should have a certain amount of trust, understanding and respect for each others interests, passions, dreams, sorrows, etc. Showing your partner that you understand this by making a concerted effort to avoid some of the pitfalls I’ve mentioned is an excellent way to make your relationship stronger and avoid the signs of an impending break up.

Don’t lose hope, the key to learning how to save your relationship is putting together a plan and sticking to it. Having a plan is vital to a happy and long term relationship. For free video - “First Steps to Stopping Your Break Up” and a proven plan that will help you save your relationship, please fill in your first name and email in the form below and I’ll give you instant access. Help is just a click away.

I wish you all the best,

Travis Scott

Tag: Stages Of A Break Up and How To Avoid Them

The secret to getting your guy back is to let them go. There is old saying “If you love somebody, let them go, for if they return, they were always yours. And if they don’t, they never were.” You did hear me correctly, you need to let them go (now I don’t mean forever). Here are some steps you can take to get your guy back and get him interested in you again.

Don’t contact him for 2-3 weeks: I mean no contact. No calls, no emails, Facebook (don’t even look at his Facebook    page, texts, etc. This is really important. You need to invoke the part of your guy that is ingrained in his human nature…by that I mean you need to make him miss you. Even though he broke up with you, you guys did have a life together and it is really hard to just turn it off in an instant. If you break off contact and then re-establish contact after a few weeks, you will significantly increase the chances that he will listen to you and give you another chance. If on the other hand you pester him by calling, emailing, etc. it will only push him further away. You both need some space in the beginning.

The other interesting thing that occurs by cutting off contact is that you will end up surprising him because that is probably not what he was expecting. More than likely he expects you to call or text him repeatedly, begging him to come back (remember expecting and wanting are two different things). If you give him “the opposite expected response” to your breakup, it will set him back and cause him to think and reflect more about the decision he made to break up. There may be a part of him that didn’t really want to break up and by not calling him, he may realize that he really misses you. This tactic is very powerful and often times it alone will get your guy back.

Formulate how you are going to re-establish contact: During the 3 weeks or so that you are hopefully not contacting him (I know this is very hard, but you can do it) write a letter to him. Write out how you really feel; reasons why you want to get back together; apologizing for things that you may have done or not done and how you will change. Basically pour your heart out, but don’t sound whiney or begging. You may end up writing it a few times and I encourage you to reread it over and over. After a few weeks, send him the letter in the mail (I mean snail mail). This is really important, as your guy is way more likely to read it all the way through if it is a letter he receives in the mail (again you are using the opposite expected response).

Don’t lose hope, the key to learning how to get your guy back is putting together a plan and sticking to it. Having a plan is vital to a successful reconciliation. For free video  - “First Steps to Stopping Your Break Up” and a proven plan that will help you get your guy back, please fill in your first name and email in the form below and I’ll give you instant access. Help is just a click away.

I wish you all the best,

Travis Scott

Women want and need to feel Appreciated

It is as simple as that.  Now Women need more things out of their partner, but if they feel appreciated for the things that they do, then most other problems can be worked through.

Most women will leave relationships if they feel that their boyfriend or husband does not appreciate her…The other thing that happens quite often is that another man will enter the picture (not always in a romantic way at first) and if they show even a hint of appreciation for her, it can push her even further from you.

The thing you really need to remember is that your appreciation must be 100% sincere or they will see right through it.  I don’t know how women do it but they all know if you are faking it.  The easiest way to make it come across more sincere is to practice (show her more often).

If your girlfriend or wife has already left you, then understanding why women leave relationships is absolutely critical to your efforts to get her back.  Try really hard to think about your life together and start writing out things that you could have shown appreciation for and didn’t.  Even small things are significant.  Here is a short list to help you get started:

This list is only to help kick start your memory and show you that women really like it when you show even a hint of appreciation for even the smallest or mundane things. 

Here is a big tip to help you win her heart back:

I suggest writing a letter to her and explain your feelings.  Apologize for whatever you did but don’t overdo it and don’t sound whiney.  Explain that this time apart has really made you think about your life together and helped you realize all the things that you may have taken for granted.  For instance, “not appreciating all the little things that she did for you” and you can even name them.

Eventually when you give this to her, it will help show her that you mean what you say and aren’t just blowing smoke to get her to come back only to turn around and do the same things that drove you apart in the first place.

It is really important before you mail the letter to her that you have a plan of what you are going to say and do after she reads it and you two have initiated contact again.  The reason is that a well written and sincere letter will more often than not will completely open the door to getting your ex back and if you don’t have a thought out plan for what to do next, you can totally blow it.  I can tell you with almost 100% certainty that if you blow your second chance, that you will rarely get another. 

Don’t lose hope, just put together your plan and stick to it.  Having a plan is vital to a successful reconciliation. For free video  - “First Steps to Stopping Your Break Up”, and a proven plan that will help you get your ex back, please fill in your first name and email in the form on the right of this page and I’ll give you instant access. Help is just a click away.

Tag: Why Women Leave | The Simple Answer To “Why Do Women Leave Relationships?”

That is all well and good but how does it help you?

When you boil it down, a very common reason why men leave relationships is that they stop feeling admired. Men are usually happy with a relationship if there they feel admired and respected. The problem with many relationships though, is that people get comfortable after awhile and the mutual love, respect and admiration can go by the way side. Now I don’t mean to say that people do this on purpose or even consciously. This is a natural occurrence between men and women after they have been in a relationship for awhile.

Now remember I said that men typically (not always) have a problem expressing their emotions. So…you are rarely going to hear them say “I don’t feel admired anymore”. On a conscious level they may not even know that is what they are feeling.

Most men measure how good their relationship is by how admired they feel and by how happy their girlfriend or wife appears to them. If you seem happy then they generally feel like they are making you happy. I know this is a very self centered approach, but it is often true. There are numerous polls regarding why men leave relationships and the most common answer was “No matter what I did, I just couldn’t make her happy anymore”.

So….what does this mean for you?

You don’t have to go around being all happy and giggly all the time to get your ex back. It is very important in any relationship for you to maintain your dignity and not act in a way that you would normally. Basically what I mean is that you should just be more aware of how you are acting and what you are saying. Always keep in the back of your mind that men generally take women for their word. They are more two dimensional than women, so if you say something nice or give them a smile, or say thank you (not that you aren’t thankful for the things he does) it will remind him that he is important and most men need this reminder quite often.

It sounds like I’m describing men as monkeys but I’m really not. A man’s brain is wired very different than a woman’s brain. They aren’t as deep or emotional. So keeping this in mind when you are with him will significantly increase the happiness in your relationship because you are going straight to part of a man that is hardwired into our DNA from thousands of years of history.

Understanding why men leave relationships is one of the first steps to getting your ex boyfriend back. The next step is to put together a plan of action to get their attention again and show them that you still want them back. It can be difficult if he was the one who did the breaking up, but don’t lose hope. Most relationships can be salvaged, you just need to know how to do it.

Don’t lose hope, just put together your plan and stick to it. Having a plan is vital to a successful reconciliation. For free video  - “First Steps to Stopping Your Break Up”, and a proven plan that will help you get your ex back, please fill in your first name and email in the form on the right of this page and I’ll give you instant access. Help is just a click away.

Tag: Why Men Leave | The Not So Simple Answer To “Why Do Men Leave Relationships?”

PR: wait… I: wait… L: wait… LD: wait… I: wait… wait… Rank: wait… Traffic: wait… Price: wait… C: wait…

This question is extremely relevant for a couple of reasons.  The first being that if he truly doesn’t love you then it might be very difficult to overcome this lack of emotion and end up hurting you more.  The second is that if he still does love you and you don’t act, then you might lose him forever.  So…(if that made any sense at all) bottom line is that if you still love him and want to get your ex back then you need to find out the answer to “does he still love me” as soon as possible. 

Ok….So how do you do that?

Quite often after a break up one person, usually the person who didn’t actually do the breaking up, will call, text, email or whatever to get their ex to talk to them and quite often the person who did the breaking up doesn’t respond which can leave you feeling very anxious and desperate.  Now just to ease your mind a bit,  the fact that he isn’t returning your calls does not mean that he doesn’t love you or that your efforts are totally in vain.

So this is what you do:

Knowing the answer to the question, “does he still love me” is critical for your efforts to get your ex back.  The technique above really does work if he does still love you.  Unfortunately it can sometimes also confirm that he doesn’t love you.  Either way, this will let you be able to move on with your life rather than wondering and regretting.

A word of caution though,  before you mail the letter make sure that you have put together a plan on what you are going to do after you guys start talking again.  Quite often people won’t think it that far ahead and totally blow it.  If you formulate a plan on what you want to talk about, how you will act, etc then you will significantly increase your chances of winning his love again and getting your ex back.

Don’t lose hope, just put together your plan and stick to it.  Having a plan is vital to a successful reconciliation. For free video  - “First Steps to Stopping Your Break Up”, and a proven plan that will help you get your ex back, please fill in your first name and email in the form on the right of this page and I’ll give you instant access. Help is just a click away. 

Tag: Does He Still Love Me? | Does He Still Care?

Human emotions can be very predictable and extremely powerful.  After a break up people go through a whole host of emotions from anger to sadness.  So a key to getting him to call you back is to focus on a couple of those primary emotions and eliminate others.  The trick is to know which ones to focus on.

After a break up the last thing someone wants to hear generally is, “please call me back, I need to talk to you”.  Typically the person doing the breaking up needs space and hearing pleading or desperation actually will push them away even more.  Try really hard to avoid coming across as sad and desperate (I know this is really difficult).  If you truly want them back then you need to turn the table and focus on different emotions.

There is an extremely successful technique that focuses on two very powerful human emotions curiosity and self-interest.  So if you really want to get him to call you back, and you need to appeal to those two emotional triggers, you are almost guaranteed a return call.

Here is a plan for getting your ex to call you back:

Even something as simple as the above example can create an extreme emotional response and make it way easier to get him to call you back.

It is very important that you take the time to put together a plan of what you are going to say and the next steps you are going to take before you jump ahead with this technique.  This can totally backfire if you are not prepared.  

For another free video  - “First Steps to Stopping Your Break Up”, and a proven plan that will help you get your ex back, please fill in your first name and email in the form on the right of this page and I’ll give you instant access.  Help is just a click away. 

Tag: How Do I Get Him To Call Me Back? | Two Emotional Triggers to Get Your Ex to Call You Back

I get tons of emails on a daily basis from people just like you that are desperately asking how to “win back my ex”.  Every situation is different, but there are a number of common behaviors that if you try to adhere to, will greatly improve your chances of winning back your ex and capturing their heart again.

My Ex Is Dating Someone Else - Video Post

Rebound relationships are very common, especially for guys.  I don’t really know why men are more prone to this than women except that most guys I know have issues with being alone.  Try hard not to lose hope.  If you really want your ex back, then just think of it as if they have gotten lost and you just need to help them find their way.  If you can live with the fact that they may have had a relationship with another person and still be together with them, then just stick to your plan.

Rebound relationships rarely ever work out and are almost never serious (unless the relationship was the reason for the break up to begin with).  The fact that your ex is dating someone else can actually work in your favor (think cup half full).  You have history with this person and you’ve had good times (yes some bad, but we’ll forget those).  Change is very hard for most people, it’s just human nature.  So leaving behind the life you two had will be difficult and stressful and I guarantee your ex is thinking about it.

Here are some reasons why your ex dating someone else can work in your favor:

Don’t lose hope, just put together your plan and stick to it.  Having a plan is vital to a successful reconciliation. For free video  - “First Steps to Stopping Your Break Up”, and a proven plan that will help you get your ex back, please fill in your first name and email in the form on the right of this page and I’ll give you instant access. 

Tag: My Ex is Dating Someone Else | Is It The End of The World

The period of time right after you have broken up or separated is an absolutely critical time in a relationship and if it isn’t handled carefully, could ruin all chances of making up with your ex.

You Shouldn’t Call Your Ex…If You Really Want Him Back - Video Post

A very common behavior particularly if you weren’t the one initiating the breakup, is calling or texting repeatedly, this is also commonly known as drunk dialing. Drunk Dialing is simply a very emotional phone call to your ex…usually at night and under the influence of a few drinks.

Repeatedly calling or texting your ex accomplishes a few things very well:

If you truly want to get your ex back then you really need to stop calling, texting or emailing them…completely (at least for a little while).  It seems totally counterintuitive, but by not calling them at all, it will generate curiosity and actually can make your ex miss you. By cutting off contact completely (at least for a few weeks), you are setting up the stage for a well worded email or short phone call asking them to meet you to “Just Talk”

Stopping all contact temporarily will:

In a nutshell, drunk dialing or texting is a very bad idea. So try really hard (I know this is very difficult for some people) to not contact them. It really does work.

For another free video  - “First Steps to Stopping Your Break Up”, and a proven plan that will help you get your ex back, please fill in your first name and email in the form on the right of this page and I’ll give you instant access.

Tag: You Shouldn’t Call Your Ex…If You Really Want Him Back

Talking After Breaking Up - Video Post

In today’s post I’m going to give you some simple tips that will help you break the ice with your ex and start the process of talking after breaking up to get your relationship back on the road to recovery.  There are a few basic rules that are essential to any break up

1)      Don’t harass him or her with phone calls or text messages. 

2)      Don’t sound desperate or mad, this just makes you appear immature and turns most people off

3)      Give them a little break from communication

Breaking the ice is very hard for most people especially after a break up, so instead of trying to get together to talk, which they frequently don’t want to see you (mainly because it is painful for them as well), write a good old fashioned letter, not email but snail mail.

No one does this anymore, so it will catch her off guard.  By writing out a letter you can pour your  heart out without fear or nervousness, re-read it, edit it, add to it and not have to worry about saying something you will regret.  The best way to get started is to just begin writing, not worrying about grammar, spelling or even how you are wording things.  Just Write!  Then go back and edit it.

Here are some things to focus on or not to focus on:

• Don’t sound desperate or angry.
• Don’t bring up gripes or things that you argued about
• Do tell her exactly how you feel about her
• What special times do you remember
• What brought you together in the first place
• What do you love about her (even small things can be powerful, like how she twists her hair when she is nervous)
• Apologizing for whatever you did or didn’t do
• What future you see for the two of you (don’t go too far with this one)

Hopefully you get the picture.  What a regular letter will do is not only enable you to say what you want to say in a non-threatening environment, but allow your ex to read it under the same circumstances.  More often than not, they will be surprised to get a letter in the mail instead of email, but will read it all the way through because they don’t have the pressure of you sitting in front of them. 

Quite often this letter will help get things back on the road to recovery.  After you mail it, give them a week or so and then call and ask if they received your letter.  Hopefully they say yes, and then ask them if you can meet for coffee, just to talk, no expectations. 

This method of talking after breaking up works very well.  You will be surprised at how well some old fashioned pen and paper works to stir some emotion.  Please give it a try.

Tag: Talking After Breaking Up